Hot Hot Hot

I am so tired of this unrelenting heat and humidity! It drones on day after day, making you want to stay inside in the cool air conditioned house...till you start to feel like summer is flying by and you have some weird form of cabin fever. Then you open the door. Smack in face it hits you. Heat. A wall of heat. You bravely step outside, perhaps a breeze will come to stir the air...no. The only air movement is caused by the buzzing wings of the mosquitoes and flies as they swarm around you sensing fresh blood. You blunder on, waving your arms, looking like some deranged person running for your car. You jump in and slam the door. Yow! Your hand seems to actually sizzle as you touch the steering wheel. Thank god you wore jeans or your legs would be melded permanently to the red hot seats. Your turn the key, the engine roars. You desperately crank up the AC hoping it will magically cool the unbreatheable air you are encased in. Finally it starts to cool a bit.....aaaaa, that's better. You go to put the car in gear when it hits you - wherever you go, you are going to have to make this crazy dash from car to building and then back out to the car again to return home....it hardly seems worth it - hmmmm perhaps a drive through is the answer - OK. You drive to the local fast food joint. Rats, you have to roll the window down to order, pay and get your food - but if you really turn the fan and AC up full blast it won't be sooo bad, right? You order - get your food, pay your bill and quickly roll the window back up. Now what? If you drive home with the food, the frigid blast of the AC in the car will render your hot juicy burger inedible (they never are the same after microwaving) if you eat it here you will have to leave the AC and engine running...further endangering the already fragile environment with those petroleum fumes...you decide to drive home - but as fast as possible and still not wind up wrapped around a lightpost, or pulled over by the local cops. You make the last turn, hit the garage door opener and prepare to make the dash through the buggy outdoors back to the safety of your home...only now your attempts at swatting the flies away is hampered by the bag, keys and cold drink you're balancing. You turn the key - throw the door open and shut as fast as possible letting in only one small - but thoroughly annoying fly who will elude your attempts as fly homicide for at least the better part of the afternoon. You collapse in a chair at the table, enjoy your still sort of warm lunch, slurp the last sip of your cold drink and realize you left your cell phone in the car, innocently sitting on the front seat, plugged into your lighter socket, quietly sucking up the power from your car battery.....and you wonder, how long until Fall?